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Reflections in Real Time

What Love Looks Like #advocatedontassume #blackmalementor #blackmentorshipmatters #blackyouthmatter #dismantlingwhiteness #fasdawareness #humilityinparenting #intergenerationalhealing #ittakesavillage #learningtolisten #lovelookslikeshowingup #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #parentingwhilewhite #presentparent #raisingblackchildren #supportnotsavior #transracialadoption #wraparoundsupport Jun 12, 2025

Melvin Hawkins Is Our Rock

There are some people who change your life just by showing up. Melvin is one of those people—for my son, and by extension, for me.

My son needed something I could never give him. Not because I didn’t love him. Not because I didn’t try. But because some things can’t be ta...

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When Family Doesn't See Your Family #adoptiveparenting #belongingandidentity #chosenfamily #familyestrangement #generationaltrauma #invisiblefamily #lovebeyondblood #parentingwhilewhite #raceandfamily #raisingblackchildren #transracialadoption #whitenessandprivilege Jun 01, 2025

I’ve learned there are two kinds of pain:
The pain you expect, and the pain that catches you off guard.

The pain I expected? Sleepless nights. Toddler tantrums. The challenge of parenting children with trauma-impacted nervous systems.

The pain I didn’t expect?

That came from family.


The Obitua...

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The Hair Talk: What I Didn't Know About My Black Children's Hair #antiracistparenting #blackjoystartsathome #culturalhumillity #dobetterlearnmore #everydayracism #hairisidentity #parentingawakening #parentingwithawareness #raisingblackchildren #transracialadoption #transracialparenting #whiteawakeparenting #whiteparentswakeup May 31, 2025

When my children were toddlers, I remember a moment in the grocery store—an older Black woman looked at my kids and said something about their hair. She was kind and gentle but I was taken aback. Defensive. Embarrassed.

Inside, I thought, Why are you criticizing me? I was doing my best. At the time...

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